Common dining out behaviors of today would, quite possible, make dear Emily Post turn over in her grave. Boisterous chatting on cell phones, messy tables and plates, slouching slothful posture, tardiness, and disastrous silverware usage are some of the most common and avoidable modern dining faux pas. For those hoping to impress or simply appear well cultured, knowing proper table etiquette is a must. There is something deeply alluring about the man or woman who knows how to dine properly—everyone eats, but only the refined dine.

Happily, it is a relatively simple process to become a dining etiquette aficionado. To illustrate, it is best to explain step by step, what you must do during a typical evening out at a nice restaurant, because, of course, one is not expected to maintain the same level of decorum at a fast food joint as one is expected to at a fine restaurant. Let us assume that you are having dinner with new acquaintances whom you wish to impress. The first etiquette hurdle is encountered before you even get to the restaurant. You must arrive well dressed and ten minutes early for your reservation—none of this “fashionably late” nonsense. Punctuality is the first indication of a well organized individual and lays the foundation for deeper respect in a relationship. Turn off your cell phone before you enter the restaurant. You must give your fellow diners your undivided attention.

Once you have arrived and are seated at the table, take your napkin, unfold it and place it in your lap. It is not necessary to display your matador leanings and vigorously shake your napkin open. Leave your napkin in your lap for the remainder of the meal, unless you excuse yourself, then lay the napkin next to your plate. When others of your party arrive, stand and greet them. Always rise when a lady enters or leaves your presence. You may begin eating when everyone from your party has been served.

The place setting need not be an area of confusion. The easiest way to remember is to simply start at the outside and work your way in; your salad fork for example is the outermost fork and your salad will be served first.  Your glasses will be on your right side, and your waiter will fill them with the appropriate liquids. It is not paramount that you hold your fork in your right or left hand. What is of the utmost importance is the way you eat with that fork. No shoveling, gnawing, slurping, picking, or tapping with your silverware, and always rest your silverware on your plate or bowl once you have used them.

There are a few things to keep in mind throughout the meal. The old rule about keeping your elbows off the table hasn’t changed—keep your elbows off the table. Pass food from left to right. Sample your food before you season it, and do not blow on your food to cool it off. Cut your food into small bites, and only as you are ready to take a bite. Excuse yourself if you must sneeze, cough, blow your nose, reapply makeup or pick at your teeth. None of these things should be done in public and especially not at the dinner table. Eat slowly and enjoy your food and the wonderful conversation; a good discussion can enhance the dining experience.

Which is, after all, what dining out should be—an experience. Proper behavior exhibited by you and your companions will allow you to focus on the cuisine and company without distraction. Embrace your inner snob and practice proper table etiquette every time you dine.